Broken relationships between mothers and daughters are all too common, but they don’t have to be permanent. If you’re ready to work on rebuilding your connection, here are six steps to help you mend your broken mother-daughter relationship:
1. Acknowledge the Elephant in the Room
The first step is to acknowledge the issues head-on. Have an honest conversation with your daughter, admitting your mistakes and taking responsibility for your actions. Let her know that you never intended to hurt her and that you’re sorry for the pain you’ve caused. By owning up to your mistakes, you’re modeling mature behavior and showing your daughter that it’s okay to be imperfect.
2. Apologize and Articulate Your Desires
After acknowledging your mistakes, it’s important to sincerely apologize. Don’t just say you’re sorry for what you said or did; apologize for how it made your daughter feel. Then, clearly state what you want the relationship to look like moving forward. For example, “I’d like for you to forgive me, come around every now and again, and join us for family functions.”
3. Respect Your Daughter’s Feelings
Respect your daughter enough to ask her how you can earn back her trust and make your desired relationship a reality. This shows that you value her input and are willing to put in the work to rebuild the relationship. Be prepared to listen to her perspective and validate her feelings, even if you don’t agree with everything she says.
4. Seek Support
Repairing a broken relationship can be challenging, so don’t be afraid to seek support from friends or a therapist. Having a neutral perspective can help you gain clarity and develop a plan for moving forward. Remember, you’re not alone in this journey, and there’s no shame in asking for help.
5. Be Patient and Persistent
Rebuilding trust takes time, so be patient and persistent in your efforts to reconnect with your daughter. If she initially rejects your attempts, don’t give up. Let her know that you love her and that you’ll be there for her when she’s ready. Keep the lines of communication open and continue to make efforts to show her that you’re committed to the relationship.
6. Embrace Your Daughter’s Adulthood
As your daughter grows into an adult, it’s important to let go of the relationship patterns that worked when she was a child. Embrace her independence and autonomy, and treat her as the adult she is. This may mean adjusting your expectations and communication style, but it’s a necessary step in building a healthy, adult-to-adult relationship.